My Wife and I Live the Same Nomad Life, But Experience It Completely Differently

If you've been reading my newsletter for a while, you know that my wife and I live a nomadic lifestyle. We're digital nomads, as people like to label us.

In case you're new here, let me give you a very brief summary: we lived a conventional life until 2021. In May, we left our home (in Miami at the time), and since then we've been home-free. We've lived with family, friends... but most of the time in Airbnbs and hotels.

I love this lifestyle, so much. I love the freedom I have. I love being out of my comfort zone on a regular basis, discovering new countries and exploring new cultures. But here's the thing: while I'm loving it, Rosie is experiencing burnout and something called "travel weary."

Despite living this entire adventure together... our experiences are completely different. Today, I invited my wife Rosie to share her side of the story, and we'll talk about what we're doing to fix this situation in a way that works for both of us. I want to show you another side of the digital nomad life that fewer people talk about.

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When Reality Hits Different

Me: So Rosie, I want to ask you... when did you first realize that we wanted different things from this whole nomad lifestyle? Like, when did it click for you that maybe our needs were starting to diverge?

Rosie: I don't have a specific date or time, honestly. I think 2023 was our best year. We traveled through Asia and saw so much, and it was still exciting and fun for both of us. Early 2024 we went to Mexico & Costa Rica, which was kind of the same, we moved pretty much every week and saw a lot of Mexico (17 cities!) which I'm so grateful for.

But then mid-2024 you wanted to focus on work and I started to lose momentum, so from July, we slowed down considerably. We spent several weeks in Thailand and Malaysia. Although for you this was really slowing down, it wasn't enough for me. Spending 4, 6 or even 8 weeks somewhere was still being on the move and on the go for me.

I think I really hit a wall in 2025. We went back to speedy traveling, visiting multiple cities in 5 months across Germany, Serbia, Montenegro & Bosnia. And finally now in August 2025, I want and need a home. I've been talking about it for a while, but we couldn't figure out where we wanted to be, do we buy or rent, which continent & country.

But I feel like I have completely burned out. So I don't think there was a specific date and time when I realized it. I've just been slowly listening to my gut and my body about what I want and need. I'm excited for next year to actually have a home base for 12 months.

Me: That's interesting because when you say "burned out," I think I was seeing the signs but maybe not understanding them fully. I've seen the changes in your behaviors, motivation, excitement. For me, slowing down to 4 or 6 weeks felt like a huge compromise, but it seems like it's still too much for you.

It's been interesting to observe this change in you, but also hard. On one side I'm worried because you're often tired even though we rest... I struggled to understand it for a while.

Also it can be frustrating sometimes because I feel like I could be doing more, but I don't want to leave you behind. I want to share things with you, it's more fun. I only started doing things (especially when they involved climbing mountains) on my own a few weeks ago.

But we've reached the point where I finally understand a change is needed, it's very obvious you cannot carry on as we've been doing. It's interesting how we've been affected very differently by all the movement.

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The Invisible Weight of Constant Motion

Me: Speaking of which, I'm curious: what's one aspect of nomad life that affects you completely differently than it affects me? Because I feel like we're living the same life but experiencing it in totally different ways.

Rosie: So many things! I can give you a list:

First, the packing and unpacking every week. You seem to just throw everything in your bag and you're done. For me, it's this whole mental load of figuring out what I need, what fits, reorganizing everything.

Me: Yes, packing is a totally different experience for us! It takes me 30 minutes, I only unpack what's necessary when your bag tends to explode. Things go back in the same place every time so it's just easy. Also my way of packing makes it easy for me to access essentials when we stay somewhere for 1 or 2 nights, so I don't need to unpack at all, where you always have to pretty much empty your bag.

Rosie: Exactly! And that's just the packing. Then there's being in a new house every week 🏠, figuring out where plugs are, how does this work, where is this thing. And being in a new city every week: where's the grocery store, what's the language, what's the money, what is there to see and do, what do we prioritize, what do we skip, is it safe, can we go in this neighborhood, what's the culture here...

The actual moving around is even more exhausting. The constant traveling ✈️: buses, coaches, ferries, trains, planes, boats, taxis, trams, tuktuks... it's a lot.

And here's something you might not realize: the fact that I film most things for my YouTube channel, which I know is my choice, but it means when we go out and visit something, I'm also working. I'm commenting on what we're seeing, getting the good angles and videos, thinking about transitions and how the video will plan out. So visiting for me is a double whammy, it's visiting the thing for myself for fun but also filming it for work.

Me: Thank you for sharing this. This is an aspect of YouTube and documenting your travel that I don't think many people realize. People see a 30-minute video, but it's countless hours of work and mental space for you.

Rosie: Exactly! And here's the thing, a few days ago, a friend mentioned that I might be suffering from "travel weary." When I looked up the symptoms, it was bang on. Travel fatigue is this total exhaustion caused by too many days or weeks of constantly being "on alert" while you travel. It shows up as just not caring about travel activities that usually excite you, and a lack of motivation to enjoy local culture. That's exactly how I feel.

What people don't realize is that my nervous system is constantly out of whack. Even when we "slow travel" (your definition of it), there's still too much stimulus for my nervous system. It's like being in constant fight-or-flight mode, even during "relaxing" moments. It's not just feeling tired, it's complete physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion. Even if I sleep well, I still feel exhausted. The only time I feel like I truly rest is when I go back home to visit family, that's when I can finally switch off.

And then there's not having friends or family around us. I miss not having girlfriends I can go shopping with, or couple friends to have dinner together, or friends to have a picnic on the beach like we did in Miami. I miss connection with other people. Because we travel so often, we don't meet people, and if we do, it's for 1 or 2 nights then we never speak again. I find it hard to keep up with my friends back home, I prefer to see people in person.

This one will sound silly, but I miss having the little luxuries in life ✨. Like I miss choosing what scent my hand wash is, having my own towels, cotton bedding (not the cheap polyester we've slept on for 3 years), or having living plants in the house, or being able to bulk buy things... like squash or cereals.

I miss having more clothes. I've worn a variation of the same clothes for 3 years. Even if I buy a new t-shirt or new shorts, it's still very practical and sensible and must mix and match with everything else I'm carrying. I don't have space for a cute bag or a pretty dress. I feel like I've lost my sense of style and a bit of my personality because I can't dress the way I want to.

And I really miss routine. I recently got diagnosed with ADHD, and I think the constant moving is good to keep me engaged and I'm good with change. But I'm also realizing that routine might be better for me. I love when we're in Asia and we wake up and go to the gym & pool & lay in the sun. It's such a good way to start the day, every day. Same with fitness, I feel like I can't get anywhere with it because we move all the time and I'm always exhausted. Plus, we don't always have access to a gym, and when we do, the equipment is different so I'm constantly figuring out what machines to use or how to do the same workout as last week but with completely new equipment.

Me: Yeah, that's a huge difference between us. I think for me, the constant change energizes me... I somehow thrive in this constant chaos. I completely understand and agree with the routine part though. Having a routine makes a lot of things much easier... it's much easier to practice self-care, be focused with work and develop healthy habits. Moving constantly is a real challenge to build habits!

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Designing a Different Future

Me: If you could wave a magic wand and redesign how we do this nomad thing to fit where you're at right now... what would that actually look like?

Rosie: My ideal setup would be a home base but still traveling. We're planning on moving to Bangkok at the start of 2026 for a year (fingers crossed 🤞 our visas get approved), so I think having my own space will be good, a place to decorate, to unpack, to call my own. Somewhere with a gym and pool so I can have some routine in my day, some time to work out, relax, and be in the sun.

I want to learn, do courses, read books. I'd love to travel once a month for 5-10 days to a new place or a favorite place. I see us going to Korea, Japan, Philippines, back to Vietnam, different parts of Thailand, Hong Kong, China... there are so many places we can visit, but maybe we go for a week and then go back home to our place. We'd pack only a small hand luggage bag.

I see us having a place with 2 bedrooms. One bedroom to rest and sleep, the other as an office with 2 desks. I want a walking pad so I can walk while I watch trash TV like Love is Blind and Love Island 📺. And then I'd love to go home every 2 or 3 months to see my parents.

I also think that with this lifestyle, I'd still film fun travel vlogs, but I'd have way more time to focus on business. There are so many courses I want to take, things I want to achieve, but I spend so much time exploring somewhere new, packing & unpacking, napping because I'm tired from travel. So I look forward to having more time & energy.

Me: It sounds like you're ready to embrace another form of traveling. No more full-time backpacking and more shorter trips nearby which won't disrupt your routines so much.

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Advice for Other Nomad Couples

Me: This might be a tough one, but... if someone came to you and said "my partner wants to travel way more than I do", like, they're in our exact situation, what would you tell them?

Rosie: I think marriage is about compromise, but I also think life is short and you need to do things that make you happy. So is there a middle ground where you're both happy?

I also think that if someone wants to travel and the other doesn't, they can do things separately. I have major FOMO when I miss out on things, but I've also realized that I can't do everything at the moment. If you want to go and do something and I don't want to, you can go alone.

I think we've become very codependent these past couple of years, we do literally everything together except pooping! 😂 But actually, it's healthy to spend time apart. I've told you that if you want to cycle across Europe, you can do it, just not with me. You'd need to find other friends to do that with.

I don't ever want to hold you back and stop you from living life. So I think there's a balance between compromise and being selfish.

Me: Compromise is the word here. We've done my ideal version of traveling a lot. Now we're going to switch to yours. What I need to get in my head is that it's not that one is better than the other, it's just a different lifestyle. What I won't get from moving around every week, I'll get somewhere else. Developing a deeper connection to a place, developing new relationships, etc.

Compromising on Bangkok was great as well. Finding a place we both love, where we feel safe, where we can have a good quality of life and where we can both find some fulfillment is important. Plus as you mention, it's a good central hub in Asia to explore surrounding countries! 🌏

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What This Means Going Forward

Here's what I'm taking away from this conversation: there's no "right" way to be a digital nomad. What works for one person, or even what worked for the same person two years ago, might not work now.

Rosie and I started this journey together, but we're evolving at different paces and in different directions. And that's okay. Actually, it's more than okay, humans are supposed to change.

The Instagram version of nomad life makes it look like everyone's loving every minute, but the reality is messier. Sometimes you need to slow down. Sometimes you need to speed up. Sometimes you need a home base. Sometimes you need to travel alone.

The key is listening to what you actually need, not what you think you should want.

This is also our reality as a married 37-year-old couple. A couple in their 20s might have a different perspective.

For us, 2026 is going to (hopefully) look different. We're taking the last 4 months of 2025 to plan next year and that home base in Bangkok, with shorter trips radiating out from there. It's not the nomad life we started with, but it might be exactly the nomad life we need now.

The plan is Bangkok for 12 months, and then... well, we don't know yet! Maybe we'll stay longer, maybe we'll move somewhere else in Thailand, maybe we'll travel at a quicker pace again, maybe we'll move back to Europe. We don't know, and that's the exciting part of life. You can make plans and they can change, and that's okay. We had the same plan in Miami, we said 1 year and let's see, we ended up staying 3 and a half years. You never know.

And maybe that's the most important lesson: your lifestyle should evolve with you, not trap you.

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What about you? If you're nomadic (or thinking about it), how has your vision of the lifestyle changed over time? Hit reply and let me know, I read every email. 💌